Enlightenment

I feel like my life has changed over night and although it is very unexpected, I am very excited for the future. How has my life changed?

First I want to reflect on the many life changing events that have happened to me over the past 21 years.

1. I was born! July 29th, 1989 was a great day for my mom to have her 3rd daughter. This wonderful event brought me to live with my family on earth. And believe me, my family is a big part of my life.

2. When I was 8 years old I became baptised a member of the LDS church and recieved the Holy Ghost, which has been the best companion to stay with me ever since. Yes, there were moments where I ignored promptings and didn't do what I should have, but without it, I would be lost.

3. When I was 13 years old, my dad moved out of our house and we had to forclose on our half million dollar home and move 5 girls into a small 2 bedroom basement until my mom, who is the most amazing woman I know, was able to provide for us by working 2 jobs without recieving child support, and we lived off of the church store house and government money provided. This was a struggling time in our life, but it truly made us all appreciate what we had and grow closer together than we had ever been in a while. The best part about it is that my mom's testimony never wavered during this great trial; her example is truly amazing to me.

4. At 15 years old I recieved my patriarchal blessing. To this day, this is one of my happiest memories. I will never forget what I felt and what was said. I love re-reading my blessing and gaining new insight into my life.

5. Then the double Ds came: driving and dating at 16 years old. I have had my baby... *cough* ...i mean my black Toyota Corola VE year 2000 since a month after my 16th birthday. It has been 5 years and I am super attached to it.. haha. Dating changed me by introducing me to the opposite sex. I grew up with all girls and really had no idea what guys were like besides when I saw them at school and I knew I was attracted to them. haha... I sure learned a lot!

6. Once I graduated high school I moved out of the house and up to Logan, UT to go to Utah State University. You grow up SO much living on your own. I am a completely different person now than I was in high school... and I am VERY happy about that. I have finished 3 whole years with 2 years of school left. Eventually I will graduate and start yet another chapter of my life.

Well, now we are caught up, but soon I am going to have yet another life changing event. No, I am not getting married... nowhere close. For the past several months nothing has seemed to work out for me and I have spent many night alone wishing I would have some kind of peace that Heavenly Father was leading me in the right direction or some kind of enlightenment on how I can get something out of this boring summer. After much determnation and never giving up, I finally recieved the greatest enlightenment I have ever experienced in my life. During a deep prayer I finally realized what it felt like to "give myself over to the Lord" and I literally told him I would do ANYTHING he asked me to. The answer came instantly and I felt so much peace and strength I cried because I was so happy.

Over the past few months I have also had people ask me if I was going to go on a mission when I turn 21, but I would always say "I have prayed about it and it is not for me." Honestly, I never prayed about it. I don't know if I was scared or if I honestly just never even considered going on one, but I just always said no. I guess Heavenly Father thinks otherwise, because in that moment of peace I knew I needed to serve a mission. I've never felt an answer so strongly before.

My life changed over night. One second I was planning a 4th year at school, but that will have to be put on hold. Goodbye school, work, computer, TV, music, boys, etc. Some might find that to be a sacrifice not worth making, but to me, I don't care. I want to go more than ever now! I feel like everything that has happened in my life has been pointing to this. Everything from relationships not working out, learning a new way to study scriptures, me waiting for a missionary, becoming overjoyed every time one of my friends joined the church, and even my mom and sister serving a mission when they were my age. I can't wait! First I need to finish filling out my papers.. haha. :)