Remember my ex who I said got a girlfriend in my 2nd blog? Well, I still am having trouble moving on. I like other guys, go on dates, and try not to think of him... what else can I do? Returning to his home town has brought back all of these memories we made together. I keep having to reread my journal to remind myself of why I broke up with him in the first place, but the problem with that is that he isn't the man he was when we dated. He is even more amazing than before and if it weren't for long distance, I know we would be together again. How do I know?
When I moved back to Idaho I was planning on getting some kind of closure to know that I didn't want to be with him anymore. I hadn't seen him for 4 months since the beginning of January, and I honestly thought I might be able to move on from him. I thought maybe I had imagined how well we read each other or how good of a kisser he was or why I liked him so much. I was wrong. When we hung out, everything I thought I had imagined was real... he was still the man I had loved for those 5 months we dated and realized I still loved. And he felt it too... we still had this amazing connection. Why him? Why do we get along so well? Why do I look for him in guys I date? Why can't I just date him? Oh yeah... I still have 2 years left of college and he wont be moving to Utah anytime soon.
So I've accepted the fact that I will always love him, but I've also accepted the fact that I NEED to move on because it is unhealthy to be hanging onto a small hope that something might work out eventually... i will only get crushed by that. How do I do move on then? I went to a wedding yesterday and some of the girls there were talking about their friend who was in the same situation as me. He couldn't get over a girl and he tried dating others to forget about her, but whenever he broke up with them, he went strait back to liking his ex. I don't want to be like that. The advice they gave him is to stop going on dates. Dating is for those who are looking for "the one" right? You shouldn't date then unless you are ready for that step. That is when I decided I am done looking to even go on dates. Of coarse I wont say no if someone asks, but I need to just learn to be happy by myself. I did it before I met my ex and I can do it again. I might not flirt as much or try to impress anyone, but right now that sounds like a great idea. I can relax and only worry about one person... me.
I love advice on moving on, so if you have any personal stories or great insight you would love to share, then I would love to hear it. Anything to help me finally move on would be great. :D
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Ironic you should post this because I am going through pretty much the same thing. Only he doesnt want me anymore... its just me, trying for about a year to get over him. I dont have any advice really because i am obviously not very good at it, but I thought I'd just give ya a shout out and let ya know your not alone in this struggle, just keep trying and keep going on dates, because you will never really get over someone amazing until you find someone equally or more amazing and then you will wonder why you had such a hard time getting over him in the first place. At least that is what I keep telling myself. Hang in there kendra, and if you ever need to talk about it... you know where to find me!
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